The One
Watched Matrix again. The MATRIX and this world of appearances and images is much the same where people keep themselves engaged in petty self conscious things. Labyrinth of images and people protect theirs at any cost. We have become machines. I have been reading Krishnamurthi lately. Let's explore his 'The Ending of Time' - read some, much left, will keep adding to this post as I go along with the book.
Note: 'Me' refers to the individual existence of man separate from anything else. When we do things out of pure selfishness, or when we do something that satisfies our ego, 'me' is operating. Now, there is also an existence that is free of 'me'(ego) i.e. selfless actions without any demands in return.
Q1: What has gone wrong with the man and the world? Why is there so much conflict? What is this conflict?
A: Man took a wrong turn many years back when he became self conscious - when he created 'I'. This created a division between man and the universe. Now, the man thinks he is different from the universe and that he will conquer the universe. Most people live with this 'me' - all activities are centred around this me and it needs to be protected at any cost. 'Me' is thought, is time. Outward movement of time has gone inward. We are always becoming. We want this, that, don't want this, that. Always some form of division is taking place with this me. 'Mine', 'Not mine'. All the state boundaries, conflicts arise because there is division between you and me. People associate themselves with an image of how they should be, what the world should be and this creates division. The particular mind - a human mind is part of the universal mind. Universal mind doesn't change. It is eternally same and we don't let this mind operate because always our particular mind is operating and creating division, images and resisting universal mind. The conflict is 'me'.
Q2: Is 'me' really the source of all our problems?
A: All the wars in the world are fought over 'me'. My country, your country, my people, your people. This division exists because there is a 'me' operating all the time making decisions, dividing things. First division is the 'me' because it cuts you away from the universal and we think we are something separate, individual existence. 'Me' is the flow of time as we think. We need an outward time like what time of day it is but that is purely mechanical, outward. Now, the problem is time has moved inward and psychologically we are trying to move through time. We are becoming something and that is flow of time, all the future exists because 'me' wants something in the future. It is not satisfied with what is or is not able to see what is. We project past into the future. All this past, future exists to give significance to me. My experiences, my memory have a significance because we think it matters. We create an image of ourselves right from childhood and carry it with us throughout life. This image is time. We get offended if someone insults us because that image of me is attacked and I need to protect that image because we want security within that image. There is so much uncertainty in the world, so, we have been taught or we learn to protect ourselves against that uncertainty. We create an image of ourselves and hold on to it, expanding or contracting it, never leaving it. This need for security creates huge conflicts in the world, make people hate each other, kill each other. The idea is so ingrained that we accept wars as rational way of living. We are so eager to label, blame others. It is our whole conditioning that we need to see.
Q3: What is time and how it is associated with 'me'?
A: Knowledge, thought is the accumulation of time. What we have learnt, our experiences, preferences gathered over the course of life, all the education that we have received, all the various interactions, relationships, all accumulated gives 'me'. This is what most people follow including me but I am trying to go beyond and as Krishnamurthi says there is no trying, no forcing that can bring about this realisation. It has to happen instantly when we see the whole truth of our existence. He says Time is our enemy because there is the sense of yesterday, tomorrow when in fact there is only now. If there is no me, there is no need of time. It is me who is always looking for something, wanting more and more which creates time. I will do this, I will get this - this is all movement of time. We need time for 'me'. There is no psychological time as such. Krishnamurthi is suggesting if we move beyond 'me', we will move beyond psychological time also.
Q4: How can we free ourselves from 'me'?
A: Imagine a life without this 'me'. Can we imagine that? Can the 'me' imagine itself to be non existent. It can't because it is self contradictory because imagining or thinking about 'not me' by 'me' is still within the field of 'me'. So, is it possible to be ever free of 'me'. This is the enquiry of Krishnamurthi. He suggests that we should see, find out if it is possible and how can it be brought about by. All these are words - representations, the truth lies beyond words and words will never actually represents the world without 'me'. It needs actual seeing without any agent, when thought has come to rest, thought i.e. 'me' has seen the truth of how utterly futile it is to force anything. Thought is needed for basic functions like driving a car but it's utility is only limited to that because psychological thought of me becoming something, me making decisions, choosing one thing over other, rejecting other is all futile. We are trying to reach what is without our judgements, biases, prejudices.
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